The Gods of Minecraft
by Mazzyandmilk
Summary: How did the Minecraft world come to be? This ancient book found eons after it was adeptly crafted will tell you what happened.


The world of Minecraftia… a very interesting tale. Nobody knew that there was a blocky world lying deep in the universe's bowels. A God was flashing around the universe when He found this empty world. There were seven days of constant work by this God. His name was Notch. He forged the voxels bit by bit for 144 long hours. The last day was a rest. For his comfort, He called the last day of the week 'Gameday'.

There was a problem. Notch was at work so hard for tens of versions until he was exhausted. He crafted through Classic, Indev and Infdev for many long hours until He reached the stage of **ALPHA. **The world was getting larger and Notch was working harder. Every time somebody was born, Notch got sacrificial gifts from the townsfolk. Most of these gifts were bits of money, but Notch loved it the most when he got apples. He liked them so much he decided he'd make it his symbol. He got apples from all over the world and bound them with the greatest of gold ingots. He was very happy.

Until the townsfolk got restless. They were raging about the sleep they didn't get and even cut off Notch's apple supply. Notch decided to then add beds to let the players sleep. He let Sulphur Man solve his identity crisis. The tropical players particularly liked the sandstone they found under the beaches. Notch let them experiment with the different worlds by planting world seeds and letting the plants grow up into clouds, into a new world.

Notch was encumbered by requests for ideas for his worlds on the Aether message boards. He suggested that they all drop modded dirt on the grass to grow new and interesting items. Even the sheep were complaining, specifically the female sheep who wanted to look 'glamorous'. Notch sent down new wool for them to grow. They really liked the new pink and purple colours that were supplied.

The towns were greeted with a new danger: Wolves. The dumb people tried to slice their blocky heads off with their swords, but they quickly got mangled by the canines. The clever ones gave them bones to chomp on and release love hearts. The players got greedy however, and they soon had wars all over the towns with their wolf warriors. The destruction ricocheted all over the land, and it quickly became dilapidated.

Notch was extremely angry with the players and as a punishment, He sent down his fist and terrible clouds blocked the sky with their jet black puffs. There was a great downpour… Engulfing water surged the land, causing devastation among every character. Some wanted to exit out of the world and choose another. Every time they did that however, it was the same; trillions of gallons of water. Some just wanted to die. That was fine with them. However, the courageous ones who weren't eaten by the hungry thunderstorms kept their head up high. One particular player was a prophet: his name was Dinnerbone. He waited out the flood on a small island… waiting for days. Luckily for him, hunger was not implemented yet, so he was fine in terms of food. He was lucky the water didn't scatter his code when he was swimming.

Dinnerbone had a map from the sugar canes of which he bashed. They didn't take long really to snap; he just punched them and they fell. Whilst waiting for his map to render, he saw a squid. He stuck his hand in the mouth of the squid and it kinda made the squid go a bit loopy. The squid went on full overdrive and smashed across the perilous waters, eventually ramming into a tree and ending its life. It became a few puddles of ink on the floor. Dinnerbone slipped down from the tree. His pixelated face splatted into silky sand. He took his head off the floor and looked around: he was on another island… but this one was flooding. The rain was dropping fast… Dinnerbone acted fast. He smashed into the tree and retrieved some wood. He quickly scrambled together a boat and swam across the land. He called it "Dinnerbone's Boat."

Notch had made a mistake. He had inadvertently destroyed the chunks of the world and left nobody except Dinnerbone standing. He had even killed all the mobs… what a sad thought! With no players to create things for, Notch abandoned Minecraftia and the Aether and left it for dead. However, Notch's brother Jeb the Demigod was looking for somewhere to stay, and Minecraftia looked just perfect. He released his new batch of items and without knowing all of the players were dead, hoped that they would enjoy the adventure.

Dinnerbone didn't know where to go, and suddenly he was feeling hungry. He looked down and saw some new things. It was the hunger bar, and there was no food for miles. Just water. A day after, his body became red for a second. It happened again. Dinnerbone was dying from hunger, and there was nothing he could do about it. He shrivelled up and became a skeleton in the boat. The boat eventually sank, and Dinnerbone's treasure is still lurking in an ocean biome somewhere.

With all of the land flooded, Jeb didn't know what to do. He decided to get together a gang of small gods and call it Mojang. They all worked on the world hard, and managed to regenerate the whole land. There were new structures to explore, namely villages. The townsfolk respawned, and they were happy they had a new name. They didn't really like looking like caveman squidwards much. But in all, they were delighted to have a new deity watching over them. They generally didn't really like that flood much.

With that came new life… and new players.

Soon all of the lands became united and modern Minecraft was forged.

And that's the end... Who knows what the future will hold?


End file.
